Cruise Reviews | Boredom and terror on the Marco Polo| Cruises.co.uk

Wednesday 20th August 2008

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Boredom and terror on the Marco Polo
Reviewed By: Landlubber, Brighton on 13th Jul 2008
Cruise Line: Transocean Tours	Times cruised before: 0
Cruise Ship: Marco Polo	Sailed: June, 2008
Destination: Northern Europe	Age: 46-55

Our trip to Iceland and the Northern Isles on the Marco Polo (27 June - 9 July 2008) was our first cruise. As it turned out to be the worst holiday we have ever had, it will also be our last cruise. Our main complaints were: • The food - ghastly vegetarian options, gelatinous desserts and an excess of indiscriminate brown sauces on everything. We felt we were in some sort of institution. • The entertainment - towel folding, ice sculpting and Radio 2 standards performed with Russian accents. Quizzes that totally relied on the passengers as entertainment. The only thing I actually enjoyed was Richard Sykes’s ‘One Song to the Tune of Another’ game. We had expected there to be talks about our ports of call (not just sales pitches for the excursions) and perhaps films on a big screen (it was too rough to stay in your cabin to watch them without feeling queezy). • Lack of information - the staff at reception knew nothing about anything. All they were trained to do was to pass the buck (blaming the weather, port authorities etc). Announcements were made only once and could not be heard in our cabin or many other rooms. They were also often unintelligible (especially if given by the Captain!). • After the trip to Heimaey in a tender we lost all faith in the crew’s seamanship. Even in a boat that didn’t break down it was terrifying and watching the crew’s inability to throw ropes to each other or winch the lifeboat back onto the main ship made me extremely nervous in the rough days that followed. • The piece de resistance was not being allowed ashore at Lerwick, where we had arranged to meet some dear friends. We were told it was because of rough seas even though in the harbour it was very smooth. Lack of plausible information meant rumours were rife and a visit from the rescue helicopter didn’t help anxiety levels! The most feasible explanation is that having arrived late due to terrifying rough seas the night before it was not considered financially viable to go ashore to run only half the tours. I notice in the new brochure that they have changed the arrival time in Lerwick to noon instead of 9am. • When after two long, long days at sea we arrived at Tilbury we were made to vacate our cabins at 8am and then had to hang about for two hours waiting to be allowed off this prison ship. There were ridiculously long queues for the Ladies and not enough places for everyone to sit down. All in all - apart from the brief visits ashore to the beautiful places we visited - this trip was a complete waste of time and money for us. It’s true that worse things do happen at sea.
Quality of Food
We mainly ate in the self-service Marco's cafe as the standard of the food did not merit the hoo-ha and long-windedness of the main restaurant. This was mass catering at its most mediocre.
Entertainment
None of the shows were to our taste but the team all seemed to be working very hard trying to keep moral up. But we lost faith even in Richard Sykes after the Lerwick fiasco. Much, much more effort was needed that day when we were facing two solid days trapped on board. A massage display and towel folding didn't cut it.
Shore Excursions	n/a
We explored the areas on our own (when we were allowed ashore that is).
Staff
The restaurant and bar staff all did their very best to be helpful, but for many of them this was their first time at sea and they were all suffering with seasickness the same as the rest of us. The team on reception were clueless though.
Children's Facilities	n/a

Onboard Activities
No. This was Butlin's on sea.
Cabins
Was fine, but stuffy.
Overall Rating

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Opinion: Agree Comment by experienced cruiser, southport (14 Jul 08 10:12) about this REVIEW.

Agree with everything Landlubber said but I would not let this put him off cruising,as experienced cruisers we would tell him that this was exceptionally bad,however we did like the entertainment(apart from the violinist & sax player)We are now enjoying our freedom from this prison ship !! Southport

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Opinion: Disagree Comment by Setter, Newton Abbot (13 Jul 08 18:05) about this REVIEW.

Oh Landlubber, What a ghastly experience! But don't give up on cruising. Look at this site and see how many of us love it and are reluctant to take any other sort of holiday! We have just booked our 17th (and our 18th!!) having started cruising in 1988. Just try a good ship, which in my opinion means something owned and operated by a "real" cruise line and not some travel co. chartering an old ship and with inexperienced crew. We love Cunard, but if you dont think they would be your cup of tea( they are prety dressy on formal nights and I know not everyone likes that, although we love it) have a look at reviews from experienced "10 times " cruisers on this site and see which ships come out well in their reviews. There are some great cruises and ships out there please dont be frightened off by one horrible one!

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